My Letters To The Little One

…love letters from the Mommy

Post # 33

on December 2, 2011

Hi Lucas! ๐Ÿ™‚ *sigh* Mommy’s still quite busy, but not because of work — because of too much thinking.

See, Mommy and Daddy have been talking about our future arrangements, once you say hello to the world. Both of us are quite uneasy about the fact that we are supposed to hire a nanny to watch over you while Daddy and Mommy are at work. I mean like, I don’t want any random stranger (no matter how trustworthy that person is) to take care of my little boy. I want to watch over you, take care of you and never miss anything you do —- but I still need to work too. *sigh*

Mommy’s looking for homebased online jobs during her break hours, so we can make a compromise regarding our situation.

Photo courtesy of Electric102.com

~Imagineย Mommy working, withย you on my lap? Probably breastfeeding?? :P~ย 

But even if the offers are quite tempting, I still feel bad about it because… okay Little One, this is our little secret, okay? Mommy’s boss had a secret talk with Mommy two weeks ago, and he mentioned that he will be promoting me to Head Teacher once I come back from my maternity leave (approximately April 2012). Mommy’s been waiting for this kind of promotion for a long time, since her supposedly first promotion from her first company backfired this year, as I resigned two weeks before the person I was supposed to replace didย (our videophone coach). I feel like if I don’t accept the promotion, I will feel like a real failure — I have worked in the education industry for almost three years (two years with Koreans) and I haven’t gotten anywhere.

Baby, I’m sorry. Mommy’s not blaming you for this, you totally don’t have to feel bad for yourself. I guess I’m just adjusting to the fact that once you have a baby, your career and social life will be placed on hold indefinitely. I mean, I don’t really mind my social life much — as long as I have Facebook and my phone’s loaded with credits, that’s okay. What I’m totally worrying about is my career growth. Mommy wants to get a really good position, so she can get good pay and buy all the things that you want and need (well, not really — you’re not going to be terribly spoiled, young man) — and I can’t do that with a meager salary.ย But if I do continue working 9 hours a day in the office, I’ll be filled with guilt for leaving you behind with some stranger who might do something really terrible. Or you know, someone who’ll ruin the bottle sterilizer for not following instructions. ๐Ÿ˜€ I’m really touchy about the sterilizer thingy.

Daddy’s salary is quite okay actually, but we both think it’s just enough for our growing needs. I don’t know, maybe Mommy’s just not used to the fact that she’ll be asking money for frivolous things for me and you — like our excessive trips to the mall. ๐Ÿ˜€

*sigh* But don’t worry Lucas, Mommy and Daddy will manage just fine, whatever happens. God will always guide us through our decisions, as long as we seek Him first.ย That’sย whyย we always have our nightly prayers with Daddy.

Sorry Baby, Mommy just needs someone to talk to. Sorry if Mommy is stressing you out with these kinds of things, and I’m also apologizing if Mommy hasn’t completely adjusted to all these things. All we want is the best for you. โ™ฅ

Is Mommy too vain? ๐Ÿ˜ฆ I’m really sorry if you think I am. ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

We love you Anak! โ™ฅ

โ™ฅ,

Mommy and Daddy

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6 responses to “Post # 33

  1. *big hugs* to you, sis… i know you’re having difficulty deciding. but here’s an unsolicited advice. when you do hire a nanny, hire her as early as possible, better before you even give birth. this way, she can be familiar with how you do things around. and you can supervise how she takes care of your little one once you give birth. that way, you won’t feel too much worry when you go back to work because you’ve seen how the nanny works. but there will always be worries, sis. always. that’s the curse of being a parent.

    • The Mommy says:

      ^Thank you sis! :’) Hehehe. Ewan ko ba, I think I have trust issues with nannies. ๐Ÿ˜€ Pero we do have one prospect na, my hubby’s friend’s sister from the province. I trust my husband’s choice, pero aaaacccckkk.. ๐Ÿ˜€ I’ll try to follow your advice sis. Thank you talaga.

      Eeeeek. Now I know how my mom feels! ๐Ÿ˜›

  2. gie says:

    try odesk sis. medyo stiff lang ang competition pero given that you have teaching background, madali ka na makakuha ng article writing assignments ๐Ÿ™‚ also, there are some companies offering tutorial services na homebased ang tutors. I’m not sure lang how that works but I have a friend na may experience sa ganun. I could ask her if interested ka. let me know sis

    ang hirap naman nun, lalo na nung promotion part, baka naman maging flexible na schedule mo with the promotion? as for the nanny part, siguro ako, mas okay if your nanny and baby Lucas are to stay with your parents/grandparents while you’re at work? para lang may nagmomonitor sa kanila. I hope this helps ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. The Mommy says:

    ^Thanks for the advice sis! ๐Ÿ™‚ I actually made my own Odesk account, kaso di ko pa nasimulan ang pag-apply for writing jobs. ๐Ÿ˜ฆ Natatakot ako kasi minsan may writer’s block ako. ๐Ÿ˜€ I also looked into homebased teaching jobs, kaso I’m worried na baka hindi enough yung pay, baka “barya-barya” lang. We need all the money we can get, kasi my hubby and I will start on our own na kasi. Di pwede magstay with my parents or grandparents, kasi para raw matuto kami on our own na mamuhay at hindi nakasandal sa kanila.

    May prospect na kami na nanny though, pero I have yet to meet her.

  4. Roxi says:

    Yanna! Work on oDesk! It’s been my work for 2+ years now and it’s really great. Lalo na now with Jacob. I did actually work while breastfeeding him! Hahaha! It wasn’t easy but do-able! And there are tons of times that I actually had him on my lap while I work.

    We don’t have a yaya for him so my husband and I care for him by ourselves. It’s tiring but rewarding because he’s very close to me and his Dad and we know that he is well taken care of. ๐Ÿ˜€

    Let me know if you need help with oDesk! ๐Ÿ˜€

    • The Mommy says:

      Really? Isn’t it like, super hard? ๐Ÿ™‚ I registered na at Odesk, but I haven’t done anything very stable just yet. Hehehe. OMG, I super want that… no yaya!!!! ๐Ÿ˜€ Anyhoo, I will PM you for details sis! ๐Ÿ™‚ TY! ๐Ÿ™‚

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